By Stephen Propst
Stephen Propst offered us 17 years of wise and practical advice. In this tribute, we share what he judged as the most important lessons learned in what he referred to as his “battle with bipolar.”
PUBLISHER’S NOTE: It is with deep sadness and heartfelt gratitude that we bid farewell to bp Magazine’s longtime columnist and dear friend, Stephen Propst, who died unexpectedly, of natural causes, on June 13, 2022. Steve was not only an accomplished author and speaker but also a mental health coach and advocate serving as the president of the Metropolitan Atlanta chapter of the DBSA for 17 years.
During that time, he wrote a quarterly column, Mind Over Mood, where he offered practical, hard-won advice on managing bipolar. We are grateful for Steve’s compassion, generosity, unique voice, and invaluable contributions to our community. In his honor, we share his final column, in which he reflected on the most salient lessons learned over a lifetime battling bipolar disorder.
* * *
Mind Over Mood: My Battle with Bipolar
It’s hard to believe that my column dates back to 2005, when I wrote about “10 things you don’t want to know about bipolar … unless you want to successfully manage it.” Now, around 70 issues later, it’s time to conclude this chapter of my life and complete the circle.
For my final column, I took some time to reflect on what it has taken to manage my battle with bipolar. Here are the top 10 things I know that matter most:
#1 Faith is foremost.
Without question, relying on my faith helps me most of all. I once thought I was in control, but God knows that wasn’t true! I’m glad that He was—and still is—ultimately in charge.
#2 I don’t know it all.
For years, I denied that anything was wrong; I thought I knew it all and could do no wrong. Then, ultimately (and predictably), I hit rock bottom. That wake-up call taught me that I had—and still have—so much to learn.
#3 Hope keeps me going.
My faith fuels my hope, which gives me the will to keep going. When I have a tough day, I can look for tomorrow to be better. When I think I’ve reached my limit, then comes the morning!
#4 I have to focus on myself.
Bipolar can deal a tough blow to one’s self-esteem. I’m no exception. A decade of therapy gave me a chance to confront my twisted thinking and start picturing myself in a more positive light. But, I still have to keep working on how I see myself.
#5 What others have to say matters.
I used to ignore anything anyone had to say. I now see great value in what others observe. They often witness what my misguided thinking—especially during manic moments—keeps me from seeing.
#6 I’m a neat freak.
I know it can drive people crazy, but I need everything to be in order. So clearing away all the clutter—and sticking to a routine—helps me control the chaos that bipolar can bring.
#7 Little things count.
The longer I live with bipolar, the more I appreciate opportunities I used to take for granted: Walking in the park, chatting with a friend, or hanging out in a café. These simple activities bring me great joy and help keep stress at bay.
#8 I am both an extrovert and an introvert.
Bipolar is truly a study in contrasts. I can be on top of the world one moment and down in the dumps the next. I tend to be extroverted when I feel good and more introverted when times are tough—which turns out to be an effective coping strategy.
#9 Finding the funny helps.
Learning to laugh—especially at myself—has made dealing with a particularly challenging diagnosis much more manageable. I’m not making light of having bipolar; I’m lightening what can be a very heavy load.
#10 I need a sense of purpose.
This diagnosis has robbed me of so much, like having a family of my own or an ongoing, full-time career. But, having a purpose in life is pivotal. Fortunately, I’ve found tremendous fulfillment by pursuing activities like public speaking, consulting, and, of course, writing.
Clarifying the Confusion & Chaos of Bipolar
With this Mind Over Mood column, I’ve tried to shed some light on what can be a complex, chaotic, and confusing condition; and perhaps even change your perspective for the better. For this opportunity, I’m grateful to everyone at the magazine.
To my readers, I so appreciate your feedback over the past 16 years. Your kind words motivated me to keep expressing mine, and your constructive criticism made me challenge my thinking. Thank you for coming along for the ride!
Used by permission.